[text; backdated to March 31st]

[loveswaffles]

I don't really care how people decide to spend their time. What you decide to do is your own business.

But if anyone tries to prank me on April 1st, I'm going to have to hurt them.

I'm not exaggerating.

[Video]

[defibrillating]

[Heyooo Institute guess who's back from his (much needed) break? This dork.]

Anyone who is joining an X-Team, please vamoose over to the nurse's office as soon as possible for a medical evaluation by me or Dr. Kobayakawa. Especially if you're under 18.

As awesome as it is to be a super hero, health is the most important thing. We'll sign you a waiver that you're fit for fight. Literally.

[After checking the date...]

...it's not an April Fools joke, by the way.

video

[mr_badguy]

[Sol, unsurprisingly, looks pretty grumpy. He's also not wearing a shirt, but it's for demonstration purposes.]

Okay, I'm sure a bunch of you idiots have heard about some bullshit called a "paleo" diet or people telling you to go "gluten-free" because of...I don't fucking know, but anyway. If they tell you that's the only thing holding you back from looking like this [He motions to himself for emphasis], they're wrong. They're also idiots, so don't listen to them. [He pauses, then sighs.]

It also won't give you super strength. No diet will do that. [He leans in like he's addressing someone in particular.] You know who you are, dumbass.