1st Bullet [video]

[seduceme]

[Darling students and whoever feels like seeing this spectacle on the network, here is your tiny blue-covered teacher with the froggy French accent, for once without a cigarette in her mouth.]

Bonjour! For those of you 'oo 'ave yet to meet me, I am Christelle Desrosiers and I will be teaching beginners and intermediate French as well as Spanish. On that note, if any of you decide to sing 'Lady Marmalade' in class, there will be consequences. [She hates that song, okay, it's been garbled terribly everywhere.]

I am partial to roses and good quality wine if you wish to try your 'ands at bribery, but the chances of it improving your grades are... [Shrugs]

Your 'omework for the first class is to 'ave the textbooks and to show up to class on time. I'm sure you can manage that much, ouis?

If you 'ave any questions regarding the course that aren't explained in the syllabus, you may email me them. Provided they are legitimate, sensible questions that 'ave yet to be addressed elsewhere, I will answer them.

Comments

[comparative_insanity]

You have a point there. I tend to get way too wrapped up in roleplay and end up making people really annoyed by saying things like, "But honestly, this isn't at all right for a nun outfit from this time period".

[No. Seriously.]

[Also yes, this is a perfectly acceptable thing to talk about on the network.]

I like your idea a lot more. If we reach a tie break, we can always add in strange and bewildering test answers, right?

[seduceme]

Not to mention if you attempt a vaguely 'istorical scene it can be quite jarring when people use the wrong words. [Mournful shaking of the head here.]

[This is definitely acceptable, right? They're just talking about roleplay, nothing fishy here.]

And most artistic doodles made on test papers!

[comparative_insanity]

Oh yes. Happily, the words for some things have not changed much with time - they have a tendency of hanging on for some reasons. But if you're going to be limited to only vulgarities, the point does tend to get a bit lost.

[So acceptable.]

With so many teacherly duties to attend to, shall I assume a second bottle in case of possible overtime~? [Nothing to see here, students, just very diligent teachers making plans for Serious Work.]

[seduceme]

Some canapes might be necessary. To keep us working 'ard through the night, of course. [So very dedicated.]

[comparative_insanity]

Of course. We're trained professionals, but we're hardly machines, right?

So... wine, food, and everyone knows the brain works best by candle light. Have I missed something?

[seduceme]

Music to relax the mind so as not to wear ourselves out too quickly with all the marking~ Something smooth rather than the racket you 'ear in nightclubs.

[comparative_insanity]

[Fai laughs.] As much as I love my dance music, I think I prefer something more classical for such an occasion - and by that I don't mean 'classical' Lady Gaga.

[Seriously, who coined that term? It was not that many years ago, for Pete's sake.]

Is this a fancy dress occasion, then?

[seduceme]

[Isn't she currently incubating in an egg somewhere anyway...]

Non, I think something casual for more comfort will be necessary. [She's leering - does this mean what it might mean or is she just trying not to laugh her face off while on the network?]

[comparative_insanity]

[Her brain is floating in a jar after her body was destroyed in a mutant battle. In space.

It's still going on tour this spring.]

Oh, I'm very good with casual. [No effort is made to hide how his eyes turn golden as he leans away a bit from the camera. He can't actually change clothes like his best friend can, but he sure can make it look that way. There's the 'disheveled gentleman of means' look, all undone tie and rumpled shirt, followed by the sort of dress the singer in a film noir night club would wear. Then his occasionally unpractical but very flattering X-man costume, and finally... the full Playboy Mansion getup, dressing gown and all, before he lets the glamour drop with a laugh.]

I'm sure I'll find something.

[seduceme]

Yes, I'm sure you will, though the dressing gown is a charming look. [So very amused.] I'll bring the wine.

[comparative_insanity]

I think I will trust your tastes to be greater than mine, even if some of my Italian ancestors are probably revolving in their graves as I say it. [Not that he has bad taste in wines, but he's not exactly all that discriminating.] If we chose my quarters, I think I could probably have the rest set up. Does this seem reasonable enough?

[seduceme]

More than. [Wink.] And when shall we set our little marking session to? [Because that's clearly what this is.]

[comparative_insanity]

[They never said exactly who was going to receive marks in the process, right?

And behold Fai being enough of an adult to actually check their schedules before replying.] We~ell, it looks like neither of us have any morning classes on Friday, so perhaps Thursday evening? In case we have a lot of work to get done. [CLEARLY they will. It's not like school has just started or anything.]

[seduceme]

That sounds perfect. I will see you come Thursday then. [There's something highly suggestive about that purring voice and smile.]

[comparative_insanity]

I look forward to it. I'll buy extra red markers. [Extra points for making even that sound suggestive, somehow.]

[seduceme]

Better make sure they're the thick ones. [Y ep.]

[comparative_insanity]

I'll do my best. But personally, I find that the important thing is technique. [Maturity.]

[seduceme]

But the thick ones do make a statement and are more fun to use. [How are they teachers]

[comparative_insanity]

That is admittedly my experience as well.
Mind you, with the right equipment, more or less any statement can be made.
[Even worse, how are they practically well-adjusted adults compared to some of the people who have held/still do hold faculty positions?]

[seduceme]

Unfortunately some statements fall a bit short of the mark.

[It's a complete and utter mystery.]

[comparative_insanity]

I'm pretty sure there's equipment for that too.
Mind you, if you're experienced enough, that problem won't even arise in the first place.

[seduceme]

I've noticed far too many pen-users 'ave the 'abit of mistaking their work as exemplary when really it's just a pathetic spurt of ink left in a garbled mess on the page.

[comparative_insanity]

Preach, sister. There's nothing more disappointing for a pen enthusiast.

Some really seem to think that simply waving it about any old way will get them anywhere. And then they rush the whole thing and leave everyone else involved dissatisfied.

[He knows her pain. Her pain is real.]

I can only hope my penmanship lives up to your standards.

[seduceme]

You seem sensitive to the details, so I'm sure you won't disappoint.

[comparative_insanity]

I certainly won't make the mistake of believing that the pen is more important than the paper. And I'll do my very best.