xavier_institute | 1st Dragon ~ Video

My dear fellow students and esteemed staff members, can you possibly imagine what it's like to finally have the wealth of the entire internet to explore, after only every having access to what you could call the abbreviated version?

[Well, that is certainly a way of introducing yourself. Luvander is straddling a chair, draped over the backrest, and he's grinning expansively at the camera. The accents suggests eastern Europe, and the elaborate top hat on his head suggests that he's confused about what century it is.]

And if you didn't answer 'terrifying' to that question after some careful consideration, I honestly fear for your sanity. From what I've surmised so far, about two thirds of anything that isn't porn seems to consist of people religiously recording their pets, and that's the least alarming part. Oh, and bear in mind now that I am disregarding the instances where people apparently combine the porn with the pets.

[Luvander, do you have a point there? At all?]

The point- [Ah, there it is.] -is that I honestly have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing here. You could say that I am somewhat of a novice when it comes to social media, if you will. Twitter appears inane, Facebook seems to be a very polite way of stalking your loved ones, Tumblr scares me, and whatever that Reddit place is supposed to be, I can honestly say that I really don't want to know.

[For someone who doesn't understand what he's doing, he certainly seems to have a lot to say about it, at least.] So for now, I am limiting myself to the school network, in hopes that if I embarrass myself in some hideous fashion here, that is a completely ordinary occurrence in American high schools... at least if I'm to believe the movies.

Oh, and I suppose the lot of you can give me some tips? I have unlimited Google at my disposal and I feel I haven't been quite traumatized enough yet, so why don't you hit me with the best you've got?

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No problem, since I don't want kids! So that works out. Just watch Goodfellas in my honor.

Oh right, I don't think you're going to get corrupted or anything, just warning you, the guys in charge are going to get on your case. Since you're under eighteen. That's kind of the law here.

[It's not like he cares if kids watch porn. He's not allowed to look at objectionable materials while on campus either, but that's another matter.]

They could take away your internet, and then you wouldn't have movies.

A most profitable exchange, then! [Luvander just laughs because no, you don't understand, he's going to watch every movie ever which he wasn't allowed to see before.]

Really, though? It's like the strange hangups about alcohol, I guess. Not that I mind overly much, it's not exactly as if I'm particularly invested in either - particularly not the latter - but it's a strange idea nonetheless.

[Noooooooot that he actually knows what the laws for such things were like for normal people back home.]

But as you say, the punishment certainly doesn't make the crime seem worth it.

Yeah, we both win. [No, he doesn't understand, but he doesn't understand most people. His not watching movies in the past was a matter of choice. And he doesn't want to watch every movie ever, only the cool ones. He has standards! And he gets exceedingly bored by anything with more feelings than action.] American movies are great. I should have started watching them sooner.

I don't get it either! I don't see the big deal. But they're real serious about it here.

[Though Adachi mostly studied and kept to himself when he was younger.]

Yeah, I thought you might want to be more careful if you were talking about it where us old people can see it.

Definitely not worth it. Bad production values.

[Luvander will consider developing standards once he has actually figured out what he likes, not what he's meant to like.] I've watched some - the kind the censors saw fit to let through because they were harmless. Mostly romantic comedies, really.

[He shrugs a bit lopsidedly. To be fair, he'd exaggerated his so-called moral corruption there quite a bit. The prostitutes had all been female and therefore of no interest to him, and alcohol is kind of mostly pointless with a healing factor. But keeping his privileges seems nice.]

I'll make a note to comport myself with greater discretion in the future, should the need ever arise to do so. I'd hate to shock and upset my nice hosts here for no reason.

Edited 2014-11-12 15:46 (UTC)

Ugh, romantic comedies... they're the worst. See, this is what's wrong with censorship, all the good stuff gets it first. Sorry about that, man.

[Adachi's independently amoral, so he doesn't care either way. The idea of kids surrounded by booze and prostitutes doesn't bother him. Nor does the idea of kids looking at dirty stuff on the internet. It's going to happen anyway. Kids will be kids.]

You probably won't shock them. We get all kinds here. But they're going to be deeply concerned about you and have a serious talk with you for your own good, and you don't want that.

Oh, I don't know, I didn't mind them usually. Great for drinking games, at least, even though my friends always falsely accuse me of cheating. But nothing quite beats the few action movies we were allowed for comedy, I guess.

[His experience of romance is limited, so maybe it really happens like it does in the movies, but he knows weapons don't work like Hollywood apparently thinks they do.

He shrugs slightly and grins.]

I'm already required to talk to councelors and social workers on a fairly regular basis, so I'm not sure how much more concerned they can get. To be fair, I'd say it's nicer to know that people care, rather than seeing proof of the opposite.

[Adachi knows all about weapons and little about romance, but he knows that's not how romance works, and he enjoys fantasy weaponry. He'd rather see people shooting other people in a fun, unrealistic manner.]

They're the worst. So lame. And I'm not a drinking games kind of guy. I'd rather just drink. Yeah, but action movies are hilarious!

[As Luvander is a student, there's no way in hell Adachi's going to express anything resembling his opinion on such matters, especially as he got in trouble last time he joked around with a student. He's never telling anyone his actual opinions ever again; it never fails to backfire on him.]

Sure it is! I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about the "this is the problem with porn" talk, which is just going to be awkward for everybody involved.

Well, I suppose it would be a strange world if we were all alike - especially if we were all alike some people I've known. That is definitely a reason to count your blessings.

[To be honest, watching typical romantic comedies - especially the ones in a high school setting - had been something of a surreal experience akin to what watching fantasy movies or period dramas might be to someone else. It had been a thoroughly different world from his, and he had enjoyed the escapism, as unlikely as it had seemed even to his inexperienced eyes.

Now, however, he makes no attempt at even hiding his amusement.]

You mean they'll explain to me that the plots are unrealistic and rather basic, and the acting is either overdone or nonexistent? Or that they are full of naked people doing naughty things - because I think that rather is the point. [Glib little asshole teenager.]

If we were all alike. Sure... who'd want that?

[Although Luvander is talking to the man who tried to force his mentality upon an entire town of people, and then some. But he wouldn't want everyone to be like some really stupid person. And besides, he's not like he used to be.]

The world would be a boring place. And how would we decide who did what and who was in charge? It'd be funny, if people started fighting over being alike.

[Adachi's experience with romantic comedies was about the same in one respect: they were completely alien to him. But they were also completely boring.

Adachi laughs.]

I know, right, what a waste of time! Everybody knows that already. But nah, it'll be about kids your age, why they shouldn't watch them, blah blah blah, not even that exciting. They really know how to hammer a point home.

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